


Second Chance

by Mysticmcknight



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2001-08-16
Updated: 2001-08-16
Packaged: 2017-11-12 19:56:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/495090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mysticmcknight/pseuds/Mysticmcknight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The universe decides to work its magic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Second Chance

**Author's Note:**

> The characters belong to Paramount. Again since they are no longer using them I’ve decided to take our boys out of the ‘closet’ and let them play and be happy. Enjoy. 
> 
> sorry but this is a predictable story. Hope you can enjoy it anyway.

It was one of the most painful things Chakotay had ever done; sitting silently watching the man he loved with all his heart and soul marry another. //It's your own damn fault, // he thought to himself for the millionth time. //If you hadn't been such a jerk to him in the beginning and then later had the courage to tell him how you felt…// he gave a small sigh. 

He was glad that he had learned to keep a neutral face when his emotions were playing havoc with his heart, for now would not be a good time to show his hurt and disappointment at today's turn of events. He was to give away the bride, the honored duty that normally a father would have, and B'Elanna was like a daughter to him, and it was important to him to see her happy, even if it was with the man of his dreams…Tom Paris. 

Chakotay focused on his love for his friend and let that look fill his eyes as he escorted her down the isle where Tom stood waiting for her, the Captain ready to perform the ceremony. He gave her hand to Tom's and at that moment felt a bit of his soul shatter, but for B'Elanna he kept it to himself and stepped back into the crowd and once again into the shadows. 

He performed his role as surrogate father well, at the wedding and at the reception, and shortly after his dance with the bride; he found his way quietly out of the banquet hall that was set up on the holodeck and headed back to his quarters. Once inside he let his heart break and cried the silent tears of loss. 

**********

The days slipped into weeks as Chakotay struggled with finding reason after reason to get up each morning and face the day and a happily married Tom Paris. He continued to remind himself that time heals all wounds and if he just kept taking it one day at a time he'll get over the beautiful young pilot and find a way to settle into his lonely existence, the latter thought being depressing enough as it was. 

Thankfully over the next few days, the crew of Voyager was kept busy with their latest nemesis, dodging, out maneuvering and putting their foes in their place. The result however was the ship took a lot of damage and they were low on supplies. They found a nearby planet that suited their needs and he led the away team, needing time off the ship and away from his heart’s desire. 

Things were going well down on the planet, harvesting the minerals they would need to convert to the necessary parts for the ship, and this left Chakotay some free time to stroll the greenery in the area. He found a large bolder and sat down and looked to the heavens, his heart silently wishing for the impossible, then wishing that the spirits would help him to let go and move on. He continued to sit there, feeling his age and his heart felt heavy in his chest when his com badge beeped. 

"Janeway to Chakotay. We're picking up enemy vessels just out side of this sector. Gather the landing party and beam aboard. If we can, we'll come back for the rest of the minerals later." 

"Aye, Captain, " he replied and dashed back to follow his orders. 

He sent the landing party and the first shipment of the minerals on ahead and he would follow with the last batch. He signaled his readiness and felt the tingling of the transporter. When he arrived he stepped off the pad and looked up just in time to see the operation's Ensign faint. Chakotay rushed to Ensign Marcus's side and gave her a tiny pat on the face, "Ensign'?" he called out a few times as she responded to his voice. She opened her dark green eyes and then proceeded to faint again. 

"Computer, emergency medical beam out, now," he ordered as he held the unconscious woman in his arms. 

When he arrived in sickbay he saw the EMH turn toward him about to ask what the problem was, as was typical, but instead, "Oh my word!" 

"She's fainted," Chakotay stated, not too pleased to see the Doctor not responding as quickly as he should be. 

"I can understand why," The Doctor replied as he moved to help Chakotay place the unconscious woman's body on the biobed. 

"What do you mean you can understand why?" Chakotay growled. 

Just before the EMH replied his com badge sounded, "Doctor," it was Janeway; "we just detected an emergency beam out from the transporter room. Is everything all right?" 

Chakotay was about to reply when he saw the EMH hold up a hand to silence him and spoke, "Captain, I need you here in sickbay," he said and then closed the channel. Then he looked at the woman and scanned her; satisfied that she would be all right, turned the scanner on Commander Chakotay. "That's what I thought," he replied flatly. 

"What is what you thought? What is going on here?" 

"Your quantum signature is off," replied the EMH. 

Chakotay had been around long enough to know what that meant. "Another AU," he groaned to himself. Then after a moment it occurred to him, "My counter part is dead, isn't he?" 

The EMH nodded, "Yes, he died in a skirmish with the local pirates three weeks ago. So you can see why Ensign Marcus…" 

"Fainted," Chakotay replied, now understanding the situation. 

Just then the doors to sickbay opened and revealed Captain Janeway, her hair up like it used to be in his universe until his Janeway cut it and when she saw him, she too almost fainted...almost. "What in the world?" 

"I’m sorry, Captain," Chakotay stated, "But it would seem that the universal powers that be once again has decided to shuffle the players," he finished with a smile, hoping to ease the tension he was feeling. 

Janeway looked over to the EMH for some understanding as to why her former friend and First Officer who died before her eyes was now standing before her very much alive. 

"Alternate Universe," the Doctor said, and it was enough for all to be explained. 

"There must have been a glitch in the transporter," Chakotay stated. 

"Must have been," Kathryn said, still stunned to be looking at Chakotay after attending the man's funeral. "I…I'll have B'Elanna check it out," she said with a swallow trying to keep her emotions in control. 

Chakotay simply nodded, "I guess a low profile would be a good idea, though you should still make an announcement. I wouldn't want anymore people ending up here in sickbay," Chakotay replied, trying his best to keep things light. 

"Yes, both sound like a good idea," Janeway replied as she stepped into the room some more. Her eyes were searching Chakotay's as if still not accepting that the man was standing before her. "I'm sorry, but…we…the crew took your death rather hard," she added. 

Chakotay couldn't help but feel touched and at the same time bad that his presence would cause anyone any more grief. "I apologize, Captain, but I didn't have any say in this matter." 

She smiled, "I know. Um…your cabin has remained untouched, for Tuvok wouldn't touch it, so…" 

"Thank you, Captain. That would be fine." 

**********

Captain Janeway had made the ship wide announcement while Chakotay was beamed to his counter parts quarters and took a moment to contemplate what life was like for him in this universe. He was tempted to look at the personal logs, but he decided against it, for it may have been him, but it was still private, and he wouldn't want another counter part reading 'his' personal logs. 

He did however, take advantage of the brandy he knew of and was surprised it was hidden exactly where he had it in his quarters. He sat on the sofa looking out the view port and just existed, for he didn't dare think or feel anything at this moment. 

He enjoyed the silence, but it was short lived as the chime sounded, "Enter" he replied, more from habit than anything else. He stood up and stared at his visitor, for he had thought it was the Captain, but seeing Tom Paris walk in his quarters was not expected. 

"I…I can't believe it," Tom replied half stunned. 

Chakotay felt awkward, "It's true, there was an error in the transporter…" 

Tom just shook his head and held up a hand, "I'm sorry," he said, a partial smile on his face. "I…I just had to see for myself," he laughed, the sort of laugh one does when nervous. 

It caused Chakotay to smile too, "Well, it's okay. I'd have to see for myself if the situation was reversed." Chakotay stood a moment and took in the sight before him, for he did detect small differences. First, no wedding ring, second he could tell that Tom had more of his hair, not quite so thinned out like in his universe. 

"Commander, are you all right?" 

Chakotay realized he had been staring, "Ah, yes, I'm fine. Just taken back by this, that's all," which was true. 

"I heard that it's going to take some time to find the cause of the accident and then find a way to get you back, er…I'm sure you don't want to stay here the entire time…?"

"No, but I don't think I should wonder around the ship either," Chakotay added. 

Tom gave a bashful grin, "Yeah, suppose your right." Then it occurred to him, "How about the holodeck. I've got time already booked…I mean…if you want to?" 

//Is this heaven or hell? // Chakotay thought. //To be asked by Tom to spend time with him? // Chakotay gave a mental sigh, //in an AU of all places. // "Yes, that sounds good to me," he said carefully as he could so not to let it be known how thrilled he was at the idea. 

Tom made sure the corridor was empty and the two men made their way to the holodeck, both silent as they went. Tom keyed in a program and opened the doors and gestured for Chakotay to go first. 

Chakotay entered the room and gasped, for what he saw was totally breath taking. "Oh, Tom!" he said, not realizing he used the pilot's first name so informally. "It's beautiful!" 

Chakotay didn't notice Tom blushing behind him for his eyes was fixed on the open blue skies, the lush green forest and the rocky mountains in the distance and all the animals that made this place seem so alive. 

"I’m glad you like it," Tom said quietly. 

"Like it, I love it!" Chakotay smiled as he turned to face his host, and then saw the light blush on Tom's fair cheeks. "Are you okay?" 

Tom smiled in reassurance; "I'm fine, really. I…I made this for…our Chakotay, but he…never got to see it," Tom replied, a flash of unreadable emotion crossed his eyes, but was quickly gone. Tom then gestured for Chakotay to lead the way; "Shall we walk?" 

"I'd like that," Chakotay replied and the two men headed forward. 

There was some small talk between the two, but mostly silence prevailed. //He's so beautiful, // Chakotay thought as the sun glistened off Tom's golden hair. //Knock it off! You shouldn't even be contemplating this. // His other side of his mind rebuked. //But how often does the universe offer another chance? Even if he does reject me, at least I can say I told him…once. // 

Suddenly both Tom and Chakotay stopped and faced each other as if on cue, "I have something I'd like to tell you," they both said together and then both laughed at the timing. 

"Go ahead," Chakotay replied, smiling. 

"No, you first," Tom said quickly. 

"No, that's all right. You go first." 

Tom stood there a moment and he first looked at Chakotay then his eyes fell downward and he began to shuffle, "I…I just…" he let out a frustrated breath. He took a step closer, a bit of determination in his eyes, but there was some fear. 

"What is it, Tom?" Chakotay asked concerned, forgetting that this was not the Tom from his universe for the moment. 

Tom seemed like he was about to speak, but then the determination was gone. "No, you go first…please?" 

Seeing the pleading in Tom's beautiful blue eyes touched Chakotay, and they were so close to each other, "I…" he stopped then took the last step that took them face to face, "I would like you to forgive me," he said in a soft voice. 

Tom blinked in surprise, "for what?" 

"For this," Chakotay said and then leaned in and did what he had wanted to do for so many years he kissed Tom Paris. 

At first Tom seemed surprised, but to Chakotay's surprise and delight, Tom returned the kiss and in moments what was soft and gentle turned loving and passionate, and the two men held on to each other as if their lives depended on it. Only the need for air broke the kiss, but the pause was short lived as both men dived back into the soul searing kiss they were sharing, neither one of them wanting it to end. 

What did cause the end of the kiss was when Chakotay felt the wetness falling down Tom's cheeks. He pulled back and saw that tears were falling down the young man's face, and guilt filled him. "I…I'm sorry," he stuttered, feeling like a heel and suddenly felt like he was taking advantage of Tom. 

"Please, don't be sorry," Tom replied. "It's just…well, I've always wanted to do that…kiss you that is…I mean kiss… you know what I mean," he stuttered in reply, his emotions were running high. 

Chakotay looked stunned himself, "You mean, you and your Chakotay…?" 

"No. I never told him how I felt. Besides, he…he had a thing for the Captain, who had a thing for someone else," Tom replied, his face blushing. 

Chakotay smiled, "I…I've always wanted to do that too," he added softly, reaching up and wiping the tears off Tom's face. 

"You mean, you and your Tom…?" 

Chakotay shook his head no, "I never told him either, plus, he's married to B'Elanna." 

"B'Elanna!" Tom's face looked stunned and almost horrified. Then he and Chakotay both laugh and more of the tension was gone. "Seems like we've both been stupid," Tom added. 

Chakotay shook his head yes. Then he looked serious, "I don't know how you feel about all this, but…I'd really like to…" he found he couldn't ask, suddenly. 

Tom's face blushed even more, "I think I feel the way you do, and I'd like that too," he said, leaning in and kissing the man before him with all he had to give. 

In a moment the two men were on the soft grass, naked and in each other's arms, taking full advantage of what most assuredly would be their only time they'd ever have together. Having Tom in his arms sent Chakotay's spirit flying and feeling his cock in the pilot's tight passage as he made love to him, was truly a sacred moment for him. As their bodies reached their climax Chakotay's heart soared beyond all reason, "I love you, Tom!" he cried out as he felt Tom's body orgasm with his, and it was intensified as he heard Tom cry out he loved him too. 

Then the two men laid quietly panting in each other's arms, taking in the other's essence and trying their best to keep reality from barging in where it was not wanted. But such things like reality don't take no for an answer. 

"Janeway to Chakotay." 

"Chakotay here Captain," he replied, keeping his breath as steady as he could. 

"I just wanted to let you know that we'll be able to send you home tomorrow morning. I've spoken to your Captain, thought the signal was weak, but all will be in alignment at 0900 hrs." 

"Thank you, Captain," he said as flat as he could and when he knew the com channel was closed he gave a heavy sigh as he closed his eyes…the reality was…he had to go back. "I'm sorry, Tom," he said, his own voice filled with pain.

"Again, don't be. At least I know now…" Tom started to say, but he couldn't hide the pain he was feeling in his heart anymore than Chakotay could at this moment. "It's me that is sorry, Cha," he said, as he reached over and wiped the soft tears off his lover's face. "I didn't mean to hurt you. I was so caught up in the situation of finally being able to be with you, I forgot…where I have to morn his loss, you have to face…your Tom everyday, for that I’m sorry." 

Chakotay opened his eyes up at the one he knew would always hold his heart, "Please don't be. I wouldn't have missed this for the world, even if it were just for this moment. It's not often the universe allows us a second chance, especially at love, even if it is only for a brief moment in time. I love you Thomas Eugene Paris, and no matter what, promise me one thing…?" 

Tom couldn't hold his own tears back anymore than Chakotay could, "What?" his voice croaked out. 

"That you will try to move on and be happy," he said, his hand tracing the delicate cheek of Tom's face, his eyes drinking in the vulnerable beauty that would be forever burned into his heart, soul and memory. 

"So long as you do too," Tom replied, knowing full well that Chakotay was just as likely to pine for him as he planned on pinning for this man beside him. Then he leaned in and started kissing the man he knew he would always love, "let's make the most of the time we have," he whispered. 

Chakotay showed his agreement by pulling Tom into his arms and kissing him deeply while holding him tightly. Then the two men started to make love to each other again. 

***************

Chakotay stood in the transporter room waiting for B'Elanna to make the final adjustments so he could be sent back to his universe. His mind continued to reflect on how good it felt to have Tom in his arms and how he would miss him, and how he understood why Tom had wanted to say their good byes in private. 

When B'Elanna signaled that she was ready, the Captain joined him in the transporter room. "Well, its time," she said. 

"Yes, it's time," Chakotay replied disheartened. 

*********

Tom had run all the way to the transporter room, realizing that he couldn't let Chakotay go…not this time, not again. He didn't know what kind of solution there could be, but hell, their Harry was from another universe, why couldn't there be Two Tom Paris's in another universe. He wouldn't mind changing his name, his hair, anything, so long as he could be with Chakotay and it might be fun having a twin brother. So long as he was with his love it wouldn't matter. 

He dashed inside the room and felt his heart and soul come crashing down, for it was empty, they had finished and he had missed his chance…his second chance at love. He stood there in silence for a long time, refusing to cry, and let the ice that he knew would now consume his soul start to converse on him. 

He walked silently back to his cabin and entered inside the darkness that mirrored how he felt and moved to the view port and leaned on the transparent wall, still fighting the tears of pain that were welding up inside him. 

"Tom?" 

Tom whirled around; his eyes opened wide, for it was Chakotay! He didn't ask any questions he just simply pounced on the man, hugging and kissing him will all his might. "I thought I blew it again!" He cried, the tears now falling, but with joy as he held the man he loved. 

Chakotay held Tom tightly, "I almost did too," he whispered. "But if the universe is going to offer me a second chance at happiness, who am I to deny it?" 

Tom leaned back, but didn't let go, "But what about your universe?" 

"One universe was going to have to do without me, and I realized I couldn't go back to not having you by my side day and night. I asked this Janeway and she agreed to let me stay. Then I said goodbye to those on the otherside, and though they were not to happy about my decision, I think they'll understand."

"What did you tell them?"

"That I had a second chance at love, and happiness, and short of them dragging me back kicking and screaming, I was home as far as I was concerned." 

Tom grinned and then kissed his love. "I’m surprised that Janeway went along with it," he said after the loving kiss. 

Chakotay looked lovingly at Tom, "Keeping me aboard was not the only thing she agreed too." 

"Well of course you'd be First Officer, no one would want it any other way," Tom smiled from ear to ear. 

"That too, but she agreed to one more thing." 

"What was that?" 

Chakotay stepped back from Tom, keeping the young man's hand's in his as he knelt down, "She agreed to marry us that is…if you'll have me?" 

Chakotay found himself on the floor being thoroughly kissed and the word 'yes' being chanted over and over again. Chakotay held his love tightly and closed his eyes, grateful beyond words that the spirits gave him this gift. At that moment he vowed to himself that he would do his best so that he would never need a second chance to live his life to the fullest and make Tom and himself the happiest two men in this universe. 

 

THE END


End file.
